Stories - Chapter 38
The Jerk
“I was born … a poor black child.” Wait, that was Steve Martin! I was born in Knoxville, Tennessee, in 1947. I still have the hospital bill, $52, which included the doctor. We lived there until 1954, until we moved to Hilo, Hawaii (which was still a territory then), pretty much on a whim by our parents. I had a younger brother by then and our Dad was offered a better job by our cousin, Bill, who grew up on the Big Island. My brother and I lived an idyllic life there, going to school barefooted, and swimming year round. After two years, our Mother got homesick and we moved back to K-town. We lived in a rural area, Maryville, locally pronounced “Murrvile”, where we could ride horses and roam freely. In 1957, Dad got a better job, and we moved to Jacksonville, Florida.
This was a letdown to say the least, after Hawaii and a farm, living in an urban environment. I made the best of it and made good grades and was on the School Boy Patrol. I really wasn’t happy, though and longed for something better. In 1959, we moved to Jacksonville Beach a few blocks from the ocean. Now things were looking up! I did well in school and was elected class president twice. I joined the local volunteer beach lifeguards and grew up fast. I still wasn’t really happy though.
After dropping out of University of Virginia, and attending Junior College, I was arrested for possession of marijuana, and spent a year on probation. The day I was released, August 18, 1968, I was on a plane for California. After three eventful years, I continued on to Honolulu, where I spent another eventful three years.
Things were rolling along until Cupid struck, and I moved back to Sacramento to be with a tourist girl, Sharon Hodel, I had met while driving a taxi on Oahu. After a year, we moved back to Florida to seek our fortune there. Our relationship ended, as many do, and I was again somewhere I really didn’t want to be. However, I had a good support system, and despite several failed attempts to leave, I worked and lived there until 2017, when my wife, Karen, and I moved to the mountains of North Carolina.
I immediately felt at home in the mountains. I missed the ocean somewhat, but Appalachia made up for it. I never felt at home in Florida, although I spent most of my life there. I now feel that Jacksonville was a duty station for me, somewhere God wanted me to be. I am grateful to be where I am now, and hope to pass away peacefully in a rocker on my front porch. I have done my duty and am ready to enjoy life and move on to whatever comes next. Peace, Light, and Love
- June 14, 2022
Bucking the System
I finished this book in the Fall of 2021. After receiveing feedback I revised it twice and it is now in the 3rd printing of 50 copies. Below is a letter I send to anyone I think might be interested.
6/6/2022
Dear Sir/Madam,
According to my college business professor, there are three phases of a project: planning, execution, and control. Planning is by far the most important phase. Our world has been operating under a feudal plan since people began gathering in societies. Even today, kings have been replaced by billionaires and authoritarian rulers. In plain terms, this is why the rich get richer and the poor get poorer.
We are fighting the same battles for social justice that our ancestors fought and that our descendants will fight, unless we change to a more equitable system. History repeats itself because times change, but human nature remains the same. I have written a short book, with resources, confirming this. The book is called Bucking the System, and is available for $15. Fifteen dollars covers the cost of printing, mailing, and free copies to those who can’t afford to pay.
The way forward, if the human race is to evolve, is to have better leaders and better education. Leaders must care for the people they lead more than their own agendas. Education must teach critical thinking and the need for civic involvement.
There are many, who are invested in the current system, who will resist change. Only one third of American colonists supported the American Revolution. Change may not happen in our lifetime. But as Moses did not get to the promised land, those of us alive today may not live to see change. Those of us who believe in social justice must forge ahead regardless. Jesus said, “Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.” That sounds like a worthy mission to me. - David
Control
My mother and Dad were good people who did their best to raise me and my two siblings to be moral and hard working. My Dad took out a loan to buy me clothes to go to college. After I was out on my own, every other letter from my Mom was either when are you going to finish college, or when are you going to get married?
Having said that, I inherited a codependent personality from them and the other older members of our family. Controlling behavior is a primary characteristic of codependent behavior. It was rampant in our family and to some extent still is today. My sister and I are aware of our tendency to be controlling and manage it best we can. My brother believes life happens and just rolls with it. He naturally tries hard to be a good person and gets along pretty good and has a happy life.
I never had a lasting relationship with a girl until I got into counseling at age 41. My counselor was into spiritual psychology, which addresses codependent behavior. I always thought in the back of my mind that there was something missing, something askew, in my life, but I never could put my finger on it. When I read a book called Recovering from Rescuing, by Jacqueline Castine, the light bulb came on, and I charted a new course in my life.
I have been happily married now for nearly 30 years. I try hard to manage myself and not be controlling. However I have to give a lot of credit to my wife, Karen, for putting up with me.
May, 2022
